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Locating Help



Some other hints are to set time limits on a piece of work, such as ten minutes to wash the dishes and clean the kitchen or one-half hour to clean out the garage. Post a time sheet on the fridge for each job that he likes to undertake and put a reasonable time limit for each job. If he or she goes over that time limit, using a stop watch, then he puts a dollar in a jar for every ten minutes of overtime. At the end of the week put that money into a savings account because you are trying to save time and your energy.
The perfectionist feels so low about himself and his efforts are not good enough. This did not happen overnight but has built up over his or her lifetime since early childhood. He has felt anxiety, worthlessness and guilt for years and is most likely depressed as a result. Medication should be suggested for him if that is the case and regular weekly therapy sessions. Talk therapy could be justified in this situation and he could talk about his chores and how he does them incessantly until they are perfect. The therapist could ask him to do the chore only twice or eventually once until he can do it in real life at home. This is visualization of a chore being done in his mind and applying it to his real world.
Perfectionism is a far reaching and controlling condition which requires as much help as anyone with diabetes or cancer. The patient has to acknowledge that he has the problem before any improvement can be measured.

 

Dealing With Perfectionism. Help in Costa Mesa

                     We all try to do our best and to perform to our best abilities at our jobs, our marriages and in our personal lives. Most of our best actions are quite adequate and done quite capably so we go to bed at night thinking our lives are wonderful. Our children are great and our homes are terrific and our housework is quite satisfactory. Or is it?
For many people this is not enough and they do not go to bed happy or feeling adequate. Their personalities are engendered from an early age to be the best, number one and do nothing less than their utmost in any activity. It is a condition which can be treated in therapy and through much patience. They were trained at an early age to do a task over and over again until it was perfect, perhaps by a highly critical parent. But the ramifications are far-reaching if this condition is not acknowledged or understood by the person.
Perfectionism is an attitude of making sure that everything is done exactly and perfectly. This can mean housework being done over and over again during the week, and on a daily basis. It means that hours are spent in mowing the lawn or weeding the garden to the detriment of other chores or members of the family. It means that you can’t leave your job until all the files are completed and all the business is taken care of before you can relax and enjoy your family. And yet that is not enough!
If the perfectionist performs an action it must be nothing less than perfect with no glitches or errors. If an error is made on some paperwork at his place of employment then he would take it very hard, reprimand himself and live with that guilt for several weeks, if not months. If a young woman was to get ready for a party or a special occasion, it would take hours of hair care, nail care, shopping for the perfect outfit and the make-up must be beyond reproach. If she hears any disgruntlement about her appearance or behaviour while at the party then she would feel snubbed and be very upset.

 

There Is Help For Costa Mesa Residents Dealing With Perfectionism


Appearances mean everything to perfectionists and if something needs fixing or repairing then the best materials and the best contractor is called in to do the job. But if the contractor cannot do it to the satisfaction of the perfectionist, the contractor is fired. This goal of being perfect in everything is so pervasive that it might be the ruin of the person himself, unless treatment is sought. However, the perfectionist feels like a great big failure and everything he or she does is so poor. They are their own number one critic and they are ruled by guilt
Treatment for the perfectionist will not be easy because it has to be of the utmost quality from the best therapist or the perfectionist will not accept the assistance. The second hurdle would be for the perfectionist to acknowledge that he or she has a problem and that it is affecting his family, his children, his spouse and his job performance. The perfectionist sees himself as not worthy of saving and should be left alone in his little world. He needs to be surrounded by his friends and family who will accept some degree of less than perfect performance. He needs to be told that he is okay and that he is fine at doing a chore or bit of work just one time, or maybe twice.